Create an absurd, grotesque neurofunk/breakcore track. Core: complex, broken drum break at 160 BPM. Bass: deep, squelching, modulating neuro-bass. Atmosphere: tense, dissonant jazz samples (sax squeals, piano clusters). Central element: clear, fast, rhythmic spoken-word male vocal, narrating with exaggerated seriousness. Music must follow the narrative's absurd twists, highlighting climaxes with sound effects (zips, impacts, toilet flushes).